Hey, somebody farted. Let’s get out of here.

24

Those are nice legs. do they come over easy?

23

I have 4 words for you “Hol I Day Inn”.

33

If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don’t worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.

13

Did you sleep in a garbage can last night? Because you are looking trashy!

13

I think there’s something wrong with my eyes…I can’t take them off of you.

11

My magic watch says that you don’t have on any underwear. (She says yes I do) Damn! it must be 15 minutes fast.

13

Do you have the time? (she/he gives you the time) No, the time to write my number down.

13

You look a lot like my next girlfriend/boyfriend

13

Can I borrow your phone? I told my ex I’d call when I found someone better.

12