If you’re as intelligent as you are beautiful, then you’d know that today is not the anniversary of the Mexican revolution, but rather the Mexican army’s unlikely victory over French forces at the battle of puebla. Now lose the pants.

170

I’m the Juan for you.

131

I’ll even throw in my secret sauce free of charge.

139

Damn boy, you can stick your taquito in my guacamole anytime you want!

144

Dayum…One look at you, chica, and my soft-shell taco got deep fried.

132

You’re rice and I am the beans. Together, we are a combo plate of bueno

168

Chica, you’re like a Piñata, cause I’d definitely hit that!

134

Ay Caramba! You’re hotter than a Jalapeño. I better wear a glove when I handle you!

138

Hablas espanol? No matter — my love needs no translation.

See also: Mexican Jokes

135

You are sexy. You are Mexican. You are a SEXICAN.

152

I’d cross borders for you.

60

I would love to stuff your piñata.

88

Are you a Bud Light Lime? Cause you look like a guilty pleasure.

64

Hey chica! There’s like, a fiesta in my pantalones and you and your amigas are invited.

55

Are you a bottle of Tabasco sauce? Cause I’d like to lose your top.

74