I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole.

85627

They call me “The Fireman” because I turn the hoes on.

82741

If you’re feeling down, I can feel you up.

82667

My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can’t hold it in.

1360

What has four legs and doesn’t have the most beautiful girl on it? My bed. Want to fix that?

1076

Baby, my house is the bowling alley + you're the bowling ball: picked up, fingered, thrown down, and keep coming back for more.

773

Are u a sea lion? Because I want to sea u lion in my bed later!

763

Cum sit on my face and I'll eat my way to your heart

669

You Say: I'm jealous of your dress. She says "Why?" You say: Because it's touching your body, and I'm not.

664

Are you on a low budget? Cause i'm free!

565

Your beauty is why God invented eye balls, your booty is why God invented my balls.

545

Did it hurt? when you fell from heaven

509

Are you made out of grapes? Because you are fine as wine!

509

Are you a trampoline? Because I wanna bounce on you~

504

Are you from Korea? Because you could be my Seoul mate.

502

You Sexy, You Fine. I Really Wanna Make You Mine.

466

Your eyes are bluer than the atlantic ocean and baby, I am lost at sea.

461

Do you have a pencil? Cause I want to erase your past and write our future.

458

Life is like a broken pencil. Pointless without you!

457

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