Hey! tell your nipples to stop staring at my eyes.

127

Are your feet tired? ‘cuz youve been running through my mind all day.

126

Do you have the time? [Gives the time] No, the time to write down my number?

118

Do you have a quarter? My mom told me to call her when I found the woman of my dreams?

117

Excuse me, I am a little short on cash, would you mind if we shared a cab home together?

104

Hey, somebody farted. Let’s get out of here.

102

Those are nice legs. do they come over easy?

96

I have 4 words for you “Hol I Day Inn”.

115

If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don’t worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.

76

Did you sleep in a garbage can last night? Because you are looking trashy!

68

I think there’s something wrong with my eyes…I can’t take them off of you.

84

My magic watch says that you don’t have on any underwear. (She says yes I do) Damn! it must be 15 minutes fast.

76

Do you have the time? (she/he gives you the time) No, the time to write my number down.

90

You look a lot like my next girlfriend/boyfriend

85

Can I borrow your phone? I told my ex I’d call when I found someone better.

86

Do you have a mirror in your pocket? (Why?) ‘Cause I could see myself in your pants.

86

My name might not be Taco Bell, but I sure can spice up your night!

83

Q: “What did the toaster say to the slice of bread?”
A: “I want you inside me!”

88

Jingle bells, Facebook smells, Google+ go away. Myspace yuck, Bing sucks, Twitter ALL the way!

64

When a penguin finds its mate they stay together for the rest of their lives. Will you be my penguin?

73