You may have heard that I’m a great ball handler. Wanna sample my skills?


I’ve never made an incomplete pass, and I hope you won’t be my first.


Hey girl, Monta Ellis must be jealous. Because you, truly, have it all.


Are you on the rebound? Because my D. Favors you.


I hit threes all the time but you’d be my first ten.


Hey girl, do you ref during the playoffs? Cause you look like you can swallow a whistle.


I can tell you must spend a lot of time on the court. It’s your lucky day, because I’m looking for somebody who loves me enough to follow an elaborate court-ship procedure, and that may take years! Make sure to emphasize the court in the courtship, otherwise a great pun could get lost in there.


I hear you’re a great dribbler. Me too. There’s a whole puddle over there where I was dribbling over you, hon’.


Hey big guy, you’ve really got an exceptionally pure shot. We’d make a cute couple, cuz I happen to be an exceptionally pure woman.


Sweetie-pumpkin, you got so much game, you must be a natural. Want to come with me to listen to a speaker on Natural Family Planning? It’s Thursday at 6:30 in the parish hall. Again, watch that pun!